Some challenges in life deserve to be taken on, but most are totally unnecessary and so not worth the effort and attention we give them. You don’t have to prove something all the time!

Knowing our natural tendencies, capacities and limitations, accepting them, and making decisions in alignment with them goes a long way to make life smooth and pleasant.

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Hello, welcome to The Feel Good Factor! I’m Susmitha Veganosaurus. I’m so glad you could join me today.

If you like this episode, or any of the episodes on my podcast, I’d love to hear from you. Drop me a voice note of a minute or under, and let me know your favourite episode, take away, whatever you like about The Feel Good Factor.

You could even ask me any question about one of the topics I’ve shared and also tell me what you’d like me to talk more about. And I’ll share your message in an upcoming episode of the show.

I dunked my tortilla chip into the bean dip and started to lift it up towards my mouth

A bit of the bean dip dropped. I watched as the blob fell onto my beautiful off-white dress. It was almost in slow motion, zoomed in, as the stain started to spread slowly, blooming on the dress.

Oh damn! I knew I shouldn’t have bought the white dress.

Here’s the thing, I’m a clumsy eater. It doesn’t matter what I wear, at some point I’m going to spill food on it. Or I might sit somewhere with a stain or have something else fall on it.

I’m very careless with my clothes, so I shouldn’t be buying white coloured or light coloured clothes where stains will show up.

But the guy at the store was very convincing

There was this beautiful dress that I loved – the cutting, the style. And I’m short. So finding a full length dress that’s perfect for my height is very rare. I liked everything about this dress. And it had a pocket also! So even more tempting.

It was an off-white colour with an aqua and blue print on it. I really liked it, but I told the shopkeeper, “Uh yeah, I can’t buy white because I’m very careless. I’ll drop food on it. I’ll make it dirty.” So he said, “Ma’am, this isn’t white. It’s off white. You won’t be able to see a stain on it.”

Yeah, right.

I believed it though. *laughs*

I believed it because I was in denial and I really really wanted to buy that dress

So I bought it. On the very next nice occasion when I was going out to eat with a bunch of friends, I wore it. I got complimented on it. And then I dropped food on it.

I should’ve known better. I should’ve known not to get an off-white dress. Either that, or not care if it gets stained.

Now there are two ways to deal with something like this. Either, I accept myself for what I am, accept the situation for what it is, understand myself, know my capacity, my limitations, and say, “No, I’ll never buy white clothes again.”

Or, I can take it up as a challenge. “You know what, I will prove it to myself, to the world (as if the world cares hehe), I’ll prove it to everyone. I can wear a pure white dress, walk around all day, go out and come back home without a single dot, single stain on it.

I could do that. I could accept it as a challenge and do it, and I’m sure I’ll be able to pull it off also. But for that, I’ll have to be consciously aware of my dress at all times throughout the day. No matter what I’m doing, whether I’m eating, sitting, working, whatever, I have to be very, very careful. I have to always think about the white dress, always have it at the back of my mind. If I do that, I’ll be able to spare the dress.

But is it worth it? Is that effort really worth it? And to what? To prove something? Who am I proving anything to?

Sometimes we have these desires, we really want something, we’re really tempted. And we know that it’s not going to suit us. It’s against our nature. It’s going to take a lot more out of us than it needs to, right?

A dress shouldn’t be taking that much of our attention! We should be able to be present in the moment and enjoy ourselves in the world. Being in flow, being aware of the food we’re eating, the friends we talking to, the work we’re doing. Not be thinking of the dress, saving one portion of our brain to focus on the dress at all times. That’s just too much of a burden!

Now, a dress is a small thing, but there are so many other bigger things in life where…

We take on challenges for no reason at all!

We like that feeling of having won the game, or having proved something. But not everything is worth that. Yes, some challenges are totally worth it, but some are not. And this is where we need to sit and work it out for our own selves.

What in our lives are we taking on that we don’t really need to? Where are we making things unnecessary difficult for ourselves when we should just leave it, drop it, let it go, and move on to something else?

Because our time effort, our energy, our focus is way better spent somewhere else.

Recently I was chatting with a friend who asked, “In 2021, when you all closed down your restaurant, do you think that if you’d lasted a little longer, somehow pushed it a few more months, you could’ve made it all the way through until now?”

The thing is, we probably could have if we’d tried really hard

As it is through 2020 we pushed hard, we got a lot of support from the community, and somehow we managed for a whole year through the scary lockdown period. We managed to survive.

But at the end of 2020 when we made the decision to shut down, we knew what we were doing. And thank goodness we did!

Yes, it hurts when you’ve been running a business for eight years, and you’re like, “oh that 10 year mark is right there.” You can taste it. It’s almost there. And we could’ve easily touched that mark, and gone past it if not for that whole lockdown and everything that happened in 2020. We could have done it.

We could’ve grown better also. Done even more, you know. The whole business was in an upward trend, and we could have really made it happen. So it was hard to let go. But also…

Letting go in the moment that we did was the best decision we made! For various reasons that struggle would not have been worth it

But because we let it go, every single one of us moved on to better things. Things that weren’t this business that we were all attached to and obsessed with.

So instead of taking it on as a bigger challenge and putting more pressure on ourselves, forcing ourselves to work more, instead of doing all that, we said, “Okay, this is it. The business as it is right now? Its life is done. And our path has to shift.”

And because of that, each one of us, we do something else in our lives that we love

We’ve grown in our own different directions, whether it’s the partners who ran the business or the employees. Or the business itself. That also took on a new form. It was taken over by one person and run in a different format, and it’s doing well.

So letting go, not trying to hold on and prove something, take up that challenge and push ourselves, was a wonderful decision!

And you know this only in hindsight, right? In that moment, we didn’t know it was the best decision. Like, we felt it in our gut, and we made a wise choice, but we didn’t know it for sure. It could have gone anyway. But it worked.

So ask yourself where you’re taking on challenges that you don’t need to take on

How are you holding on to things, trying to prove things to yourself, to the world, to anybody, where you don’t really need to be proving anything to anybody.

Look at all the facets of your life, your work, your creativity, your relationships, your business, your learning, self-improvement areas…everywhere. Just give it a scan, look through it. Then ask yourself, “Where are the places I need to just embrace acceptance and letting go? And which are the areas where the challenge is really worth continuing?”

Only you can answer that question, not the world, not anybody else. And then make the decision to change things around, embrace acceptance over challenge where it needs to be done. Because I promise you, that’s only going to change your world for the better!

Oh and my white dress? I managed to wash it and the stain doesn’t show so much, so I just wear it anyway. Nobody knows but me that there’s a hidden stain on that dress now. *laughs*

All right! If you enjoyed this episode leave me a voice note.

I look forward to talking to you again next week. Take care. Bye!

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Susmitha Veganosaurus

“I’m a Spiritual Vegan Multi-Passionate Entrepreneur. I read voraciously, find humour in most things, and believe kindness and authenticity can make this world a happier, loving place.

If my content resonates with you, join my free newsletter where I share Life and Business Tips, Vegan Hacks, Holistic Guidance, and more.

Vegan cuisine and holistic business building are my two biggest passions. If you’re looking for guidance with vegan cooking, or want to grow your conscious business with joy and fulfilment, explore ways we can work togetherhere.”

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